Fear

Occasionally, Reagan struggles with fear. The fear comes in many different forms...monsters under the bed, sounds from her closet, a shadow in the corner, etc. The fear can totally overtake her little mind and make her scream out for Mommy. I go to her and immediately tell her that she is safe, that there is nothing to be afraid of. Each time this happens, I remind her that God is a very present help in times of trouble. I pray with her and remind her that God is always there, that He never leaves her side.

Why is it so easy to teach that lesson to Reagan but so hard to remember that lesson when it comes to silencing my own fears? I worry a lot. It is my weakness. I am a "what if" person. At least once a week, I'll start a conversation with Gene that starts with this phrase, "Yes, but, what if ____________ happens?" (You can fill in the blank with a thousand different scenarios.) The thing that stirs up the greatest fear is something happening to one of my children. I am still thinking about Gracen's little incident at the doctor's office a few weeks ago and the helplessness I felt. I was scared to death that there was something seriously wrong with her. I still worry that she will have reoccurring bladder infections which means she could have serious kidney problems. The next thing that comes to my mind is kidney failure. I am probably thinking about this needlessly. Why do I torture myself so?

Just as I tell Reagan not to fear, I need to remember that God has told me not to fear. One Bible commentary said that the phrase "Fear not", or the equivalent to it, is said 365 times in the Bible. Well, that means that we have a different verse to read every single day of the year. One of my favorites is Isaiah 41:10, "So do not fear, for I am with you; Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand." Isn't that a great verse?

I read somewhere that FEAR stands for False Expectations Appearing Real. The more I think on the what-if's in life, the more real they become, taking on larger than life proportions. I have to remember to take all of my fears, all of concerns to God and leave them at his feet. I cannot control my life or my children's lives by worrying about them and fearing the unknown. The reality is that each of my children belong to the Lord. He has assigned a certain number of days to each of them and nothing I can do or don't do will change that. Matthew 6:27 says, "Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life?" Oh, if I could just process this truth, maybe I wouldn't be so mentally exhausted at the end of each day.

Dear Lord, please help me to make the right choice when fear threatens to invade my life. Help me not to react to fear, but to turn to You. Thank you Lord, for being the stronghold of my life.